What To Know About Vee Relationships, the Polyamorous Structure Some People Swear By

by Gabrielle Kassel Polyamory is a broad relationship structure that allows for more than one romantic relationship to be active at a given time. And within that dynamic, a variety of different, smaller relationship structures can emerge. One of these is a vee relationship: a three-person dynamic where one partner is very involved with the other two, and those two are less involved with each other. “Polyamory is a consent, communication, and honesty driven relationship structure that allows folks to engage in many loving relationships,” says queer- and polyamory-inclusive sex educator Lateef Taylor. With a vee relationship, specifically, one partner is known as … Continue reading What To Know About Vee Relationships, the Polyamorous Structure Some People Swear By

Why science says the pursuit of happiness has a dark side

As counterintuitive as it might sound, chasing happiness so closely could be making us miserable. by Erin Carson It’s a reasonable guess that most people want to be happy. “The pursuit of happiness” is even enshrined as a basic right in the Declaration of Independence, suggesting that whatever road gets you to “happy” — whether it’s daily morning runs, reading with the kids, dinner and drinks with friends or a simple five minutes of silence — is a road you’re entitled to take.  But in the midst of a global pandemic, with hundreds of thousands of lives lost, rampant unemployment and a … Continue reading Why science says the pursuit of happiness has a dark side

SOMETHING WICKED THIS WAY COMES: ANARCHY IS BEING LOOSED UPON THE NATION

John W. Whitehead, Rutherford Waking Times “Every day I ask myself the same question: How can this be happening in America? How can people like these be in charge of our country? If I didn’t see it with my own eyes, I’d think I was having a hallucination.”—Philip Roth, novelist Things are falling apart. How much longer we can sustain the fiction that we live in a constitutional republic, I cannot say, but anarchy is being loosed upon the nation. We are witnessing the unraveling of the American dream one injustice at a time. Day after day, the government’s crimes against the citizenry … Continue reading SOMETHING WICKED THIS WAY COMES: ANARCHY IS BEING LOOSED UPON THE NATION

HOW LONG SHOULD YOU DATE SOMEONE YOU’RE ONLY KIND OF INTO?

Being ‘meh’ about a person you’re dating might say more about you than it does about them by Lauren Vinopal  At this point, I’ve written about my romantic failures enough to recognize that I’m at least the common denominator, possibly even the problem. Though my intimacy issues are vast, friends, therapists and exes have all described me as “emotionally unavailable.” And so, I date equally emotionally unavailable men — a truly abundant natural resource — in order to not have to deal with making a decision. Occasionally, an emotionally available dude sneaks into the mix, and I have to either run away or face … Continue reading HOW LONG SHOULD YOU DATE SOMEONE YOU’RE ONLY KIND OF INTO?

The science of wisdom

Psychological science can now measure and nurture wisdom, superseding the speculations of philosophy and religion Igor Grossmann is associate professor of psychology and director of the Wisdom and Culture Lab at the University of Waterloo in Canada. He is also an associate editor of the journal Social Psychological and Personality Science. He is the founder of the behavioural and social science Forecasting Collaborative, and co-hosts the podcast On Wisdom. He lives in Toronto. Edited by Pam Weintraub Wisdom is full of paradoxes. It is one of the oldest topics in the intellectual history of humanity, and yet talking about wisdom can feel odd and disingenuous. People seem … Continue reading The science of wisdom

The psychology of user decisions

How can designers support the actual decision-making process of users? by Jordan Bowman We like to apply labels to users: they’re irrational, lazy, unpredictable, rushed, and so on. To some extent that may be true — we aren’t machines. But research shows that users actually make decisions based on a set of predictable subconscious patterns. To create satisfying digital experiences, UX designers should be aware of — and support — these cognitive habits. Heuristics Human beings use psychological tactics and biases to get to decisions quickly. These mental shortcuts are called heuristics. We use heuristics in everyday life, but we especially … Continue reading The psychology of user decisions

This incredible Google experiment lets you time travel to your hometown 200 years ago

The open-source map shows the changes that happen to city streetscapes over time. BY NATE BERG In the 20 years he’d lived in New York, Raimondas Kiveris had seen the city change immensely. “It was a completely different place, a different town,” says Kiveris, a software engineer at Google Research. This got him wondering what his neighborhood looked like even before that—before he’d lived there, before he’d even been born. “There’s really no easy way to find that information in any organized way,” he says. “So I was starting to think, can we somehow enable this kind of virtual time travel?” … Continue reading This incredible Google experiment lets you time travel to your hometown 200 years ago

Karma doesn’t work how most people think it does

Eastern traditions have complex views on how karma affects your life. by Paul Ratner  Karma is not simple retribution for bad deeds. Eastern traditions view karma as part of a cycle of birth and rebirth. Actions and intentions can influence karma, which can be both positive and negative. The news that Donald Trump got sick with COVID-19 prompted “karma” to trend on social media. The President downplayed the virus, openly mocked the practice of wearing masks, shared misinformation, and held super spreader events for thousands of followers. But what happened to him was not necessarily karma (or at least, we can’t really know). Chances are, karma is not … Continue reading Karma doesn’t work how most people think it does

Consider Yourself a Tourist

Advice from the Dalai Lama on making our lives meaningful and dealing with our mortality. By Dalai Lama Within less than fifty years, I, Tenzin Gyatso, the Buddhist monk, will be no more than a memory. Indeed, it is doubtful whether a single person reading these words will be alive a century from now. Time passes unhindered. When we make mistakes, we cannot turn the clock back and try again. All we can do is use the present well. Therefore, if when our final day comes we are able to look back and see that we have lived full, productive, and … Continue reading Consider Yourself a Tourist

THE PEOPLE WALKER IS STILL JUST PUTTING ONE FOOT IN FRONT OF THE OTHER

by C. Brian Smith In Los Angeles, a man named Chuck has become a folk hero for one humble service: taking strangers on walks. He’s proving the buddy system can change lives — one step at a time Twice a week for the past month, I’ve paid an underemployed actor $30 an hour to walk me through the hills of L.A. like a Labrador. Chuck McCarthy isn’t a dog walker, though; he’s a people walker — the “People Walker,” in fact — who has accompanied hundreds of strangers on foot for thousands miles since 2016, when he began walking people to earn a few … Continue reading THE PEOPLE WALKER IS STILL JUST PUTTING ONE FOOT IN FRONT OF THE OTHER