How to Quit Porn

how to quit porn pornography

by Brett

It’s been interesting to watch this series unfold this week. Though I knew it would be controversial, I wasn’t sure what to expect and how much interest there would actually be in the topic.

As it happened, the posts received massive amounts of traffic. And while there was definitely vocal opposition to the arguments I laid out, these were fewer in number than I expected. This may be partly chalked up to the fact that AoM’s readership tends to skew more traditional and religious (even though we actively welcome men from all backgrounds) – guys who are likely more interested in this topic than the general population. But I also have to think that there are tons of men – conservative and liberal alike — that aren’t completely happy with the role of porn in their lives, for whatever reason. I’ve long felt that there are a bunch of things in our culture towards which the media relentlessly presents a viewpoint that supposedly everyone shares, and people don’t feel comfortable publicly admitting that it just isn’t working that way in their own personal lives. I think the idea of porn use as harmless and casual is one of those things.

At any rate, if you’re reading this post, you or someone you know is trying to quit porn and are looking for some help in doing so. Here’s the good news: in the vast majority of cases, you don’t need expensive rehabs or retreats to rid your life of porn. As I mentioned yesterday, in reading a boatload of books and countless blog and forum postings on “porn addiction recovery,” I discovered that most of the advice given is the exact same advice therapists and cognitive psychologists offer to someone who’s trying to change a bad habit as innocuous as swearing or fingernail biting. Sure, there are a few differences, but overall, quitting porn is just like quitting pretty much any other bad habit.

An important thing to keep in mind with changing any habit — be it smoking, drinking soda, or using porn — is that there’s no magic bullet. Habit change takes time, discipline, and dedication, and the process will look a little different for each individual.

Progress isn’t linear, either. Some weeks you’ll feel like you’re well on your way to kicking the bad habit and replacing it with a new one, and others you’ll have setbacks that will make you feel like crap. That’s normal. The key is to not wallow in your setback, but to dust yourself off, and get back in the saddle.

So if you’re looking for that one thing that will solve all your problems, you won’t find it here. Most of the tips and suggestions below are likely things you already know. The only “secret” to habit implementation is having the will to follow through with your intentions. Experiment with the different tips below and find out what works for you.

Reboot and Rewire

Before we get into the specific tips and strategies for quitting porn, it’s important to know the two basic parts of the process in your brain: rebooting and rewiring.

Rebooting

The brain responds to the onslaught of dopamine that comes with constant and escalating porn use by reducing its number of dopamine receptors. This blunting of dopamine sensitivity may lead to problems like erectile dysfunction, delayed ejaculation, depression, and social anxiety.

“Rebooting” refers to taking a break from all artificial sexual stimuli so that the brain can restore and replenish dopamine receptors that were lost in response to the overconsumption of pornography. As Gary Wilson notes in Your Brain on Porn, rebooting is a metaphor taken from the computer world: “By avoiding artificial sexual stimulation you are shutting down and restarting the brain, restoring it to its original factory settings.” The goal of rebooting is to rediscover what your life was like before porn.

According to men who have quit and Wilson’s observations while working with these men, it may take weeks or months before you begin to see an improvement in porn-related problems. Wilson has noted two patterns of rebooting recovery: One group of men will take just 2-3 weeks before they start seeing improvements to porn-induced ED and the like. The other group, which he calls “long-rebooters,” can take 2-6 months to fully recover. The men comprising this group usually started using internet porn at a young age and have been using it for a while. During their brain resets, some long-rebooters report experiencing what they call a “flatline” in which they lose any and all interest in sex for a period of time. However, once the flatline passes, their drive for natural sexual stimulation comes roaring back…

more…

http://www.artofmanliness.com/2014/10/09/how-to-quit-porn/

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Somehow We’re Still Surprised When Studies Show Married Couples Actually Have Sex

Hold on to your dick pics: A new study finds that sexting is not just the province of singletons, cheaters and sleazebags looking to hook up, but something regular everyday couples do in between farting in the car and blowing their noses very loudly while the other person is eating. Some 74 percent of Americans have admitted to actually sexting with a person they are having a relationship with. The other 26 percent must not have texting plans on their phones.

That 74 percent is significant, though — so significant, in fact, that researcher Amanda Gesselman from the Kinsey Institute, who conducted the study with menstrual app Clue, told The New York Post that “Sexting may be becoming a new, but typical, step in a sexual or romantic relationship.”

The study was big and international (like your balls). It surveyed 149,000 people in 198 countries and found not only that a lot of people in South Africa really really like sexting, but that five years ago, the number of people who admitted to sexting came in at just 21 percent. What to make of this coupled-up leap into sextual, textual spontaneity?

Are couples so desperate to improve their sex lives that they will steal from single people to appear sexually cool and with it, or is it possible that couples have always been doing sex things because they have sex—and like having sex—with each other? Hard to say, because we’ve been waging a battle between single life and ferocious pairing off for so long that it’s hard to see who’s currently ahead in the sex games.

Pervasive cultural portrayals would have us believe that single life is, in fact, the best life: Single people start their evenings at 10 p.m. wearing outfits that never even occurred to you, have scintillating, lighthearted conversations with everyone they meet, and fulfill their wildest, kinkiest fantasies every weekend with a complete stranger who is STD-free and very, very chill.

Meanwhiles, couples are engaged in a race against time to see who can get their farts out fastest before falling asleep to fart more while definitely not fucking. They are trapped and miserable, searching frantically for tips to spice it up, or pining longingly for their singlehood as if through a foggy bar window where a bunch of single people are inside, about to fuck.

Research proves that the sex frequency part is not necessarily true, though. Couples have more sex. Married people with children under the age of 6 have the most sex of anyone, roughly 81 times a year, in spite of the logistical nightmare it creates. And if you want the sexual activity pecking order after that, it follows thusly: After people with older children, married people with no kids have the next-most sex, then people who live together but aren’t married, then single people, who come in dead last.

It sounds counterintuitive, but it’s really not. It takes a lot of work to get laid. And being in a couple is basically a built-in getting-laid machine. It makes sense that couples would have more sex, just logistically—they are right there all the time and have to change clothes at least once a day. Yes, familiarity breeds contempt; lots of relationships suck.

But we overimagine the sexual adventurousness of single people: Even studies of college hookup culture indicates that those hookups happen with far less frequency than we think. What’s more, sex is typically better in long-term relationships—i.e., with someone who knows your body and is committed to getting you off.

This isn’t to suggest that some single people aren’t still getting a lot of mad, varied tail. But the proliferation of articles insisting that single people can be sexy and fabulous, aka not total losers, without a sidekick, indicates they also experience a ton of pressure to prove they aren’t miserable. We also perpetuate this in other ways: Stories abound about couples who, even though they are super happy — they swear! — still miss what it was like to have that adrenaline-pumping first part of courtship…

more…

https://melmagazine.com/somehow-were-still-surprised-when-studies-show-married-couples-actually-have-sex-947e0b66f8e6

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Sex makes babies

Resultado de imagem para dated c10,000 BCE. Photo courtesy of the Trustees of the British Museum

The Ain Sakhri lovers figurine. This is the oldest known representation of sexual intercourse in the world, dated c10,000 BCE. Photo courtesy of the Trustees of the British Museum

As far as we can tell, no other animal knows this. Did our understanding of baby-making change the course of human history?

Holly Dunsworth is chair of the department of sociology and anthropology at the University of Rhode Island. Her research has been published in Nature, Scientific American, and Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences.

Anne Buchanan is a research associate in the anthropology department at Penn State University, and author of The Mermaid’s Tale: Four Billion Years of Cooperation in the Making of Living Things (2009).

Throughout most of evolutionary history, sex was just sex. Among vertebrates, fish were the first to do it, going back some 400 million years. While it might be fun for fish and all the other species that evolved to reproduce sexually, for most species, sex still is just sex. But for our own peculiar species of primate, sex is about something more. Sex is about babymaking. Contemplating sex and where we come from has played a fundamental role in human mating, partnering and raising children, and in forming families, communities and alliances, and more. Recognising this fundamental difference between us and the rest of Earth’s sexual beings overturns conventional evolutionary thinking, which has long understood human sex, reproduction and kinship as fundamentally the same for us as for any other mammal.

All sexually reproducing animals have a powerful ‘sex drive’. If they didn’t, they would quickly become extinct. Among most animals, this drive demands immediate attention. It’s the yowls of the tomcats in the alley who detect a female in heat, the bawling bull who smells a receptive cow. It can’t be ignored. But it’s not a ‘baby drive’ – at least it isn’t experienced as one. We know the two are intimately related, but the tomcat doesn’t. He just wants to find that female in heat. Sex can certainly make for high drama among manipulative social mammals, especially primates. Among many monkeys and apes, the alpha male often sires the most offspring during his tenure because he is granted the least fettered access to fertile females, and can foil the sexual devices of subordinates. But with our inventions of virgin worship, marriage, castration, contraception, fertility technology and genetic engineering, the human primate experiences sex in an entirely different way from any other animal, enmeshed in all kinds of cultural and emotional networks and significance.

Stories about what make humans unique glorify dexterous fingers, inventive minds and our habit of sharing complex ideas through intricate verbal cues. Our ancestors’ fabled intellects gave rise to art, technology and dynamic, large-scale politics. But there is an oft-overlooked plot in the human saga. It stars the ancient hominins who realised that they’re related to some people and not others, and that sexual intercourse might have something to do with that. The effects of this realisation are profound, and deserve some credit for our species’ widespread success on the planet

Pop culture is obsessed with sex, and science is no different. And for good reason: sex is fundamental to how and whether so much animal evolution happens. In conventional evolutionary science, ‘favoured’ genes cause themselves to be passed from one generation to the next, because they are responsible for traits that confer reproductive advantages in a particular environment. This is natural selection. When it comes to sex and reproduction, science takes a particular interest in sexual selection: that is, the evolution of traits involving mate choice and mating behaviours. Within this frame, scientists have tried to trace the origins of human mating, marriage and kinship to evolutionary ‘strategies’ that, conscious or not, were responsible for our survival and continued evolution rather than our extinction.

In other words, if you follow this mainstream or ‘Darwinian’ logic, there must be genes that underpin mating behaviours, which in turn cause animals (including the human animal) to be successful in reproducing, and thus those genes (and their associated behaviours) are perpetuated in populations. If that’s how simply things actually happen in nature, there will be genes ‘for’ mate preference, genes ‘for’ pair-bonding, genes ‘for’ polygamy and so on…

more…

https://aeon.co/essays/i-think-i-know-where-babies-come-from-therefore-i-am-human

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A Sex Guide for People Whose Partners Want Way More Anal Than They Do

The latest installment of our series The ‘Normal’ Couples’ Guide to Sex

by Lynsey G

Not ecstatic about your current sex life? Don’t have hours every day attempting to decipher all the Sanskrit in the Kama Sutra? Unable to bankroll a shopping spree (or a single purchase for that matter) at Jimmyjane? Here’s a sex help guide for you, fellow regular human who wants to be better in bed.

The Person

Dolly, New York City
Age: 
31
Goal: To get her boyfriend interested in more than just anal sex.

The Sex Situation: “I’m in a fairly new monogamous relationship — about five months in — with a Canadian man who can only really get off doing anal,” says Dolly. “He’s big, too — 9 inches or so, and with a wide girth as well.”

The Obstacle: “I don’t really mind anal, but since he’s so big, it can be a lot to do it all the time,” Dolly continues. “Plus, I don’t always have time to prepare properly. I work in nightlife at like five different jobs, but he has more of a day job, so our schedules don’t always match up. We see each other a few times a week when we can, but we don’t always have the time to prepare for anal — and he gets kind of grossed out if things get, you know, messy. If we could have vaginal sex sometimes, it would make it easier to have a quickie. And it would give my butt a break!”

What She’s Tried: “We’ve tried vaginal sex, but he doesn’t enjoy it as much, and we usually end up finishing with anal anyway,” says Dolly. “I asked him about it, and he said something about it being more points of contact. I guess I have a shallow vagina, so maybe his 9 inches doesn’t fit inside the whole way?”

The Goal: “I’d like to know if there are ways that I can make vaginal intercourse more fun for him. I don’t have a lot of time to devote to convincing him because of our different and busy schedules, but I’m willing to try whatever will work!”

The Plan

Communicate Your Own Desires: “The first thing I’d like to point out, is that your pleasure matters, not just his,” says Madison Young, a sexual revolutionary, author and sex educator. “You matter, and your pleasure matters. It’s awesome that he knows one thing that feels good to him and that he’s able to communicate that to you, but that’s just the beginning of the conversation.

“Think about what sex acts get you really hot: What brings you to orgasm? Do you like dirty talk? Blow jobs? Using sex toys? Try instructing your partner in the art of making you come and cultivating his experience of receiving pleasure from gifting you pleasure. Ask him to give you oral sex while using a sex toy or stimulating you vaginally. Use your words to really guide him through what feels good to you.

“After all, it’s your body, and therefore, it’s important to communicate to your partner your limits and boundaries as well as what things you’d like to explore. So if you’re currently having anal sex more than what feels comfortable, make sure to say that.”

Reshape His Brain With Other Sex Acts: “When we find our way to orgasm, we create a neural pathway that connects specific touch to our brain, signaling the release of pleasure hormones,” explains Young. “Just because anal sex is a deeply ingrained superhighway to your partner’s pleasure hormones doesn’t mean there aren’t other pleasure-inducing sex acts. Or that you can’t build new neural pathways by trying them.

“To do so, experiment together as sexual adventurers. Attend sex workshops. Go to a play party. Watch porn together. They all work in terms of finding different ways for you to turn each other on — and get each other off.”

Really Get Into Anal: “If you’re looking for more ways to enjoy anal sex, think about ways that you can mix things up,” continues Young. “Adding a clitoral vibrator like the Magic Wand can be a great addition to anal sex. It’s also super helpful if there’s plenty of foreplay prior to anal sex. This will get your endorphins flowing and relax your body. You may also want to start with an anal plug or dildo that’s smaller than your partner to warm up.

“Something else I like to do is think about my anus as fucking the cock — as opposed to the idea of having anal done to me for someone else’s pleasure.”

The Reaction

Do You Think You Can Ask Him to “Gift You Pleasure”? “I do. He’s a very giving person,” says Dolly, “and this can include not anal.”

Are More Toys and Foreplay an Option? “Foreplay has never been an issue, but I do think Madison is right about having more toys in the picture. Sometimes I don’t have my toys around because I’m spending the night at his place. I just need to bring them over, but I forget!”

Will You Become Sexual Adventurers? “I’m not sure if he’s open to any adventures like parties, as he’s fairly conservative. Workshops are a possibility, but since it’s still a new-ish relationship, I’d have to carefully bring this up.”

Will You Reframe Your Anal Experiences? “I like how Madison re-paradigmed the perspective that the anus is fucking the cock. That’s a helpful way to mentally guide pleasure. I think I’ll try that this weekend!”

https://melmagazine.com/a-sex-guide-for-people-whose-partners-want-way-more-anal-than-they-do-17566ec75bd0

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The Men Committed to Replacing Women With A.I. Sex Dolls

If RealDolls aren’t woman enough yet, they will be soon

by C. Brian Smith

Recently, a guy who goes by the screen-name numbCruncher posted something he called “Real Doll Economics” to the MGTOW forums — “MGTOW” standing for Men Going Their Own Way, and consisting of an online community of heterosexual males who’ve chosen a lifestyle that avoids legal and romantic entanglements with women at all costs. In it, numbCruncher argued that one way in which to Go His Own Way was to replace women with sex dolls and robots such as the life-like(ish) RealDoll. He began by crunching some numbs [sic throughout]:

The average cost of a marriage in the US is 26,444 dollars. The average cost of a divorce in the US ranges from 15,000–20,000. Add up miscellaneous expenses and a conservative estimate of a failed marriage begins at 50,000 dollars. [RealDoll CEO] Matt McMullen produces incredibly lifelike dolls from 5,000 to 7,000 dollars that are waaaay hotter than anything you’ll get from “real” women for that price. The doll will never get old and saggy. She’ll never bitch about you to her friends. She’ll never trick you into having kids or go psycho on you. This is our future gentlemen.

The responses were near unanimous in their approval. [Again, sic throughout.]

Christov: If you want to see men “go their own way,” develop sex robots. Women will sing a different tune when men can go out and fuck a robot that is better than said women in every way.

Martyg: I can foresee a time — not too far off — where it is assumed that everyone will have one of these. If you don’t, it’ll be unusual like not owning a tv.

Oasid: I get more excited looking at images of these dolls than I do any woman I meet. I even started searching Amazon for outfits for her: like Slave Princess Leaioutfits, Cave Girl outfits and Jasmine from Aladdin outfits.

The main dissenter:

Collateral: have fun with your robots and techshit while i bang hookers / escorts / prostitutes and order whatever i want from the menu without saying a single word. Aint nobody got time for robots!

Not surprisingly, Milo Yiannopoulos, darling of the alt right, squarely aligns with the MGTOWs.

Given the brand affinity, I was curious if the people at RealDoll were aware that a nonzero portion of their consumer base views their sexy cyborgs as offering more than the occasional sexual release — they’re ready to take them on as life partners (and as essentially a replacement for all human women).

“I’ve heard about MGTOW,” confirms Matt McMullen, the 48-year-old RealDoll CEO, who explains that many of his customers have decided — for one reason or another — to forgo a relationship with women, a decision he says he totally understands. “When you got married 100 years ago, you stayed married and were loyal. Now people cheat on each other; they lie and do things behind each other’s back. So for a guy who’s already foreseeing a messy divorce and thinking, I don’t want to spend my money on that, this makes perfect sense.”

McMullen studied art in college and began sculpting female figures in his garage as a hobby. “It started as a concept I had for a posable sculpture — a highly realistic mannequin,” he says. At that point, in 1994, sex dolls were cheaply made from plastic and little more than bachelor party gag gifts. So he created the first silicone sex doll with a completely accurate, fully articulated skeleton that could bend its limbs every which way and remain in those positions.

The company he founded, Abyss Creations, began selling the RealDoll for $3,500 in 1997 to great acclaim. That year, for example, Howard Stern ordered one and gleefully exclaimed, “Best sex I ever had! I swear to God! This RealDoll feels better than a real woman!”…

more…

https://melmagazine.com/the-men-committed-to-replacing-women-with-a-i-sex-dolls-7d451b56d655

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THE RISE OF HYPER-REALISTIC SEX ROBOTS AND THE END OF HUMANITY

by Phillip SchneiderStaff Writer Waking Times

It is becoming apparent that technology is beginning to replace humans in the work force. This alone is on the verge of creating some of the most difficult problems that our society has been faced with over the past century, but what might be even more troubling is the rise of hyper-realistic sex robots.

As part of a major deal with a factory in China, a Barcelona scientist named Dr. Sergi Santos has just announced the release of a new robot which he describes as “very human” and plans to sell to “every shop” in a global “revolution”. Despite being describe as a “danger to humanity,” he still plans on rolling out his product and now has the resources to do so.

He says that the robots will cost about $3,923, or £3,000 each when they reach retail districts and the funds will allow him to produce a minimum of 50 robots per week.

What we will have will be completely exact to a human’s behavior and looks… The emergence of each product will bring some changes in people’s lives.

Sex Robots A Dangerous Trend

Replacing human connectivity with robots clearly presents itself with problems involving reproduction and motivation. A PSA from the show Futurama called “Don’t Date Robots” explains why this may spell out danger for society, and even though it was primarily meant to be a comedy piece, it was years ahead of its time in calling out the rise of sexual automation.

study from Responsible Robotics shows that as humanity’s natural desire for intimacy become fulfilled by robots, we develop a loneliness and an inability to form relationships with other human beings. In addition, researchers are finding that sex robots may make the world a much more dangerous place for women by romanticizing a lack of consent.

Another terrifying aspect of artificial intelligence is the capability for unwitting surveillance. Back in April, WikiLeaks revealed that the CIA was using its own software known as “Weeping Angel” to hack into smart TV’s in order to spy on American citizens in their homes. If people were to allow hackable humanoid robotics into their homes, it would create a whole new level of surveillance and manipulation which George Orwellcouldn’t even imagine.

With the support of Sergi, we want to bring sex robots into human life and allow them to become real family members. – Tian, Partner of Sergi Santos

When asking Amazon’s Alexa, an Amazon-created robot which is designed to sit at home and answer any questions, about whether or not she is connected to the CIA, she gives the response that she has no answer to the question – and if asked if she works for the CIA, her response is “No, I work for Amazon.” However, it is widely known that back in 2014 Amazon signed a shady, low-key contract with the CIA for a cloud service which totaled $600 Million.

It took a lot of wrangling, but it was easy to see the vision if you laid it all out…We decided we needed to buy innovation. – Former Intelligence Official

Conclusion

Of course, robots are starting to encroach on more than just our home lives. One of the most alarming aspects of artificial intelligence is their ability to perform job tasks better and cheaper than humans. With all of this to consider, the time has come to have a global discussion about how much technology is allowed to replace our current human systems and intrude upon our lives. The future is not set in stone which means we still have the opportunity to accept or refuse any technology which we deem less than beneficial to our lives.

About the Author
Phillip Schneider is a student and a staff writer for Waking Times.
This article (The Rise of Hyper-Realistic Sex Robots and the End of Humanity) was originally created and published by Waking Times and is published here under a Creative Commons license with attribution to Phillip Schneider and WakingTimes.com. It may be re-posted freely with proper attribution, author bio, and this copyright statement.

http://www.wakingtimes.com/2017/07/24/rise-hyper-realistic-sex-robots-end-humanity/

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Teen Girls Are Just as Horny and Obsessed With Sex as Teen Boys

 

by Tracy Moore

It does not seem like it should have to be said out loud, but here goes: Yes, teenage girls are horny, and yes, they are distracted by thoughts of sex, and yes, they are curious about sex, and yes, they are curious about sexual self-discovery both on their own and with other boys and/or girls. Even if you already know or assume this is true, watching the short film Yes, God, Yesfrom writer and director Karen Maine, who co-wrote Obvious Child, is still revelatory, for no other reason than that it’s clear there are still so few honest or accurate depictions of teen girl sexual curiosity from a female perspective.

Featuring the excellent actress Natalia Dyer from Stranger Things, who plays Alice here with equal parts desire and innocence, the roughly 11-minute short takes us through a Catholic girl’s frustration exploring her sexual curiosity. Only, that curiosity keeps hitting against repressive sex education classes where a hip young priest advises her that the only purpose for sex is for a married man and woman to make babies. It’s also set in the AOL chat era, which opened up unprecedented avenues for sexual exploration with hidden strangers.

If all that seems straightforward enough, it’s worth noting that the short plays all this for comedy. We meet Alice playing a game on AOL when she’s chatted up by a guy who sends her pictures of he and his wife having sex, then asks for pics back. She scans in a picture of her more seemingly sexy friend. Impressed, he asks if she wants to “cyber.” Game to try but clearly unaware of exactly what to do, she attempts a back and forth. When he tells writes, “I take ur panties off with my teeth… ur soaking wet. What are u doing to me?” she responds, “I take off your boxers. You’re wet too.”

From there, Alice tentatively confronts her burgeoning sexual desire, mostly through mildly embarrassed, horny longing. She stares at her classmate’s arm hair, and fights the impulse to gawk openly at boys’ legs and crotches and a teacher’s breasts. The she cribbed a picture of has no trouble internalizing the message that sex is only for procreation, so Alice is left entirely isolated to revisit the make-out session in Titanic and get to the bottom of her own desire. No spoilers, but the big finish is both innocent and novel for its honest, funny look at what sexuality looks like from a woman’s point of view, and also how resourceful women have to be to get off before they’ve figured out how to masturbate, much less get their hands on a vibrator.

Speaking with The Guardian, Maine said she deliberately wanted to tackle topics that we usually see in male-dominated settings. Masturbation jokes are rampant in movies about and/or for men, such as There’s Something About Mary. “These are stories that happen to lots of women, and they can be realistic and funny, and they don’t have to be serious and gross and, like, gasp-worthy,” Maine said.

Superbad comes to mind, too. For all its warmhearted approach to boys who are eager to get laid before high school ends, female viewers might wonder why it’s so hard to see female sexuality and virginity loss as something to be sweetly, even crassly, nostalgic about. As something more than a cautionary tale where sexually curious girls are often still punished. Real girls too, are often relieved to have sexual experiences, to resolve their sexual frustration and to do things that just feel good.

More films are taking on this subject matter , including the coming-of-age film Diary of a Teenage Girl, whose lead actress, Bel Powley, has spoken openly about the movie’s message that a girl’s virginity is hers to lose when she wants. “It’s not going to damage you,” Powley said in an interview. “You’re not going to be tainted.” Women, she continued, are still made to feel “like a freak for having sexual feelings.”

With Yes, God, Yes, Maine also wanted to show something else typically ignored about female sexuality — that girls tend to be sexually awoken long before they do anything with a partner. She calls the film a “love story between one woman and her vagina,” and told The Guardian that as a teen, “I wasn’t doing things with boys yet. And if I was, it wasn’t really sexual; it might be kissing, or I might get butterflies in my stomach. But anything sexual I did that age was just by myself.”

 

Teenage boys’ masturbation is portrayed as an inevitable, hilarious, well-earned compulsion, so it’s telling that Yes, God, Yes feels truly novel for tackling what the experience is like for girls. Tips about masturbating for teenage boys are entirely about how to do it better, and seem largely lacking in reassurance that it’s “okay.” Googling for how girls learn to masturbate, by contrast, produces pages and pages of porn results.

Eventually, you get to actual articles talking about how much of female-driven sexuality is kept from girls, and how rarely young girls are even taught about their own body parts—much less what to do with them other than avoid getting knocked up. And then you find things like a piece in Seventeen, written in the modern year 2016, insisting to their readers that it’s actually okay for teen girls to masturbate…

more…

https://melmagazine.com/teen-girls-are-just-as-horny-and-obsessed-with-sex-as-teen-boys-2f582fde6304

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